What's the Most Clueless Question Someone's Asked In Class?

[kenjixshadow]

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[Reckoner]

This is completely true. There was no sex education in my culture and I was taught by "uneducated" folks that babies come out from the anus. Let just say I didn't find out the truth until college...

I can only imagine what you were doing with pregnancy tests

 

[kenjixshadow]

x

 

[deleted500612]

My freshman year of high school I asked where the prostate was in women and everyone though I was joking.


I wasn't.

This doesn't seem unreasonably clueless, I doubt many kids that age know what a prostate is.

 

[SH3]

Happened in a small group - classmate thought restriction endonuclease only worked on the cells own DNA (and nothing else) because it has the prefix 'endo-' which means within.

 

[colbgw02]

Happened in a small group - classmate thought restriction endonuclease only worked on the cells own DNA (and nothing else) because it has the prefix 'endo-' which means within.

Boy, that guy sounds like a real *****.

 

[SH3]

Boy, that guy sounds like a real *****.

Definitely not at the top of the class

 

[Pacna]

While an abdominal ultrasound was being projected, the prof asked someone what the black thing at the back was, which he had identified about 1 minute earlier as the IVC. "Mitral valve?"

I don't think I've ever heard so many facepalms.

 

[CajunMedic]

During a lecture on female reproductive anatomy: "Where's the G-spot located?"

We had one of those during reproductive physiology. "Have there been any peer-reviewed studies as to the existence of the G-Spot?"

 

[touchpause13]

We had one of those during reproductive physiology. "Have there been any peer-reviewed studies as to the existence of the G-Spot?"

Oh come on!

 

[acapnial]

We had one of those during reproductive physiology. "Have there been any peer-reviewed studies as to the existence of the G-Spot?"

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22240236

I, uh, looked it up for a friend....

 

[Psai]

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22240236

I, uh, looked it up for a friend....

Ain't nothing like performing original research

 

[ute]

I've heard a third year nursing student claim that there is no such thing as the superior vena cava because she saw an x-ray and it didn't show it. She made this statement infront of the whole class.

bump.

Third year in a 2 year program?

 

[Psai]

Third year in a 2 year program?

There's some bachelor's that are 4 years

 

[TheShowGoesOn]

Third year in a 2 year program?

I'm in Canada, we have a Bachelor of Science in Nursing program it's 4 years.

 

[touchpause13]

I'm in Canada, we have a Bachelor of Science in Nursing program it's 4 years.

We have that here in muricka too

 

[Elixir6]

I have so many I could add to this thread:

Me: Can a penis break? Like fracture?

Entire room

Prof: [Trauma Blonde], what is a fracture?

I defined fracture.

Prof: so if a penis has no bone, it can't be fractured.

Me: but it can have a "boner " (trying to salvage my dignity with humor)

Even though there is no bone in your "boner" it can fracture. The corpus cavernosum ruptures and you get a big ol' hematoma.

 

[seminoma]

"Why don't you treat rsv with antibiotics?". This was an MS2, and at my school we do micro/immuno during MS1.

 

[deleted500612]

In undergrad, I had biochem with a new professor and we were talking about fermentation. A student asks, "this is a bit off topic, but isn't a good way to cure a hangover by drinking more?" Prof replies, "[student], I know I said there are no stupid questions at the beginning of the term, but I'm retracting that after hearing this."

It sounds like the student was probably just confusing a hangover with alcohol withdrawal (which could indeed be "cured" by drinking more alcohol, and in its milder incarnation, could even present with similar symptoms to a hangover)

 

[J ROD]

Do we have to come to class?

 

[masaraksh]

Happened in a small group - classmate thought restriction endonuclease only worked on the cells own DNA (and nothing else) because it has the prefix 'endo-' which means within.

Should have explained that ANY ENDO-scope can fit within his @$$

 

[Apoplexy__]

Not any stupid questions, but there was this one girl in my class who just said a lot of weird things. We do small group too, so it amped up the awkwardness factor.

-Our professor tells us some really sad story of his daughter having breast cancer and being on tamoxifen. He prefaces it with something like "I want to bring this case alive for you guys" and clearly is trying to convey emotion and to get away from the academics for a second. This chick treats it like a pimp question. I kid you not, she starts quoting the textbook about the pharmacology of tamoxifen and its indications directly in the middle of his story.
-Out of nowhere, she tells us she's a virgin. Like, we're talking about Hodgkin lymphoma or something, and she says "xyz, which is interesting to me because I'm a virgin."
-When we covered PCOS, she starts telling us about her periods in relative detail.

 

[touchpause13]

Not any stupid questions, but there was this one girl in my class who just said a lot of weird things. We do small group too, so it amped up the awkwardness factor.

-Our professor tells us some really sad story of his daughter having breast cancer and being on tamoxifen. He prefaces it with something like "I want to bring this case alive for you guys" and clearly is trying to convey emotion and to get away from the academics for a second. This chick treats it like a pimp question. I kid you not, she starts quoting the textbook about the pharmacology of tamoxifen and its indications directly in the middle of his story.
-Out of nowhere, she tells us she's a virgin. Like, we're talking about Hodgkin lymphoma or something, and she says "xyz, which is interesting to me because I'm a virgin."
-When we covered PCOS, she starts telling us about her periods in relative detail.

Ah yes, the classic over-sharer. I think every class has at least one

 

[seminoma]

In undergrad, I had biochem with a new professor and we were talking about fermentation. A student asks, "this is a bit off topic, but isn't a good way to cure a hangover by drinking more?" Prof replies, "[student], I know I said there are no stupid questions at the beginning of the term, but I'm retracting that after hearing this."

Idk I don't think that's a stupid question.

 

[cbrons]

I've heard a third year nursing student claim that there is no such thing as the superior vena cava because she saw an x-ray and it didn't show it. She made this statement infront of the whole class.

bump.

I have had a practicing nurse practitioner ask me if she can give a patient metoprolol instead of warfarin for a-fib (she thought one was a substitute for the other). (She thought I was the pharmacy student).

 

[VisionaryTics]

I have had a practicing nurse practitioner ask me if she can give a patient metoprolol instead of warfarin for a-fib (she thought one was a substitute for the other). (She thought I was the pharmacy student).

Happened to me, too.

Even worse, she was an emergency NP who asked me what the dose for warfarin was when she had a patient come in with new-onset afib and neuro symptoms. Woof.

 

[seminoma]

I have had a practicing nurse practitioner ask me if she can give a patient metoprolol instead of warfarin for a-fib (she thought one was a substitute for the other). (She thought I was the pharmacy student).

Happened to me, too.

Even worse, she was an emergency NP who asked me what the dose for warfarin was when she had a patient come in with new-onset afib and neuro symptoms. Woof.

What do you even say to that?

 

[akwho]

What do you even say to that?

IV warfarin bolus stat

 

[Stagg737]

Not really one question, but there's one person in my class who always asks about something the professor said literally 5 seconds earlier. Example

Prof: The Na-K pump is a form of active transport because it pumps sodium out of the cell and potassium into the cell against their respective gradients.

Student: So you're saying that it's active transport because it's moving the sodium and potassium against their gradients?

It's even worse because the questions are always a re-wording of what the professor just said. I wouldn't mind her just asking to repeat what the prof just said if the answer wasn't right on the slides that everyone has access to before the lecture starts and our lectures weren't recorded. Every time I see her hand go up I want to bang my head against a wall before she even asks anything.

 

[Wordead]

IV warfarin bolus stat

Well hopefully not that....

 

[NontradCA]

I have had a practicing nurse practitioner ask me if she can give a patient metoprolol instead of warfarin for a-fib (she thought one was a substitute for the other). (She thought I was the pharmacy student).

 

[cbrons]

What do you even say to that?

As a student all I said was to send the patient to the ER (this was an outpatient free weekend clinic).

Then in my head I had to repeat the indoctrination homily that my school promotes:
**HUMMMMM** ALL PROVIDERS ARE EQUAL. **HUMMMMM** NPS ARE JUST AS GOOD AS MDS. **HUMMMM** ALL PROVIDERS ARE EQUAL.

 

[cbrons]

IV warfarin bolus stat

That wouldnt be any less ignorant than the NP who yelled for "STAT IV kayexalate" for hyperkalemia-induced V-tach. Forgot who told that story here a month ago or so.

 

[TheShowGoesOn]

I have had a practicing nurse practitioner ask me if she can give a patient metoprolol instead of warfarin for a-fib (she thought one was a substitute for the other). (She thought I was the pharmacy student).

That scares me. Let's hope she's not on the code team, she'd probably start things off by asking the patient to swallow a big 200mg tab of metoprolol. It's an antiarrythmic right? A-fib is a rhythm, therefore metoprolol must be the cure!

 

[Tired]

...

 

[Jabbed]

Not really one question, but there's one person in my class who always asks about something the professor said literally 5 seconds earlier. Example

Prof: The Na-K pump is a form of active transport because it pumps sodium out of the cell and potassium into the cell against their respective gradients.

Student: So you're saying that it's active transport because it's moving the sodium and potassium against their gradients?

It's even worse because the questions are always a re-wording of what the professor just said. I wouldn't mind her just asking to repeat what the prof just said if the answer wasn't right on the slides that everyone has access to before the lecture starts and our lectures weren't recorded. Every time I see her hand go up I want to bang my head against a wall before she even asks anything.

Good reflections. I can tell that he's acing his OSCEs.

 

[zeppelinpage4]

I have had a practicing nurse practitioner ask me if she can give a patient metoprolol instead of warfarin for a-fib (she thought one was a substitute for the other). (She thought I was the pharmacy student).

How...wha...how?!
I feel slightly dumber having just read that question. Maybe it's cause I'm cramming for boards and this stuff is fresh in my head...but it seems like very basic knowledge. I expect a fresh nursing school graduate would know the difference too.

I'm honestly shocked.

 

[pd1112]

http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22240236
I, uh, looked it up for a friend....

It's incredible that this is in a peer-reviewed journal. Over half of the abstract looks like it came from TFM

Even though there is no bone in your "boner" it can fracture. The corpus cavernosum ruptures and you get a big ol' hematoma.

Yours doesn't have a bone?

It sounds like the student was probably just confusing a hangover with alcohol withdrawal (which could indeed be "cured" by drinking more alcohol, and in its milder incarnation, could even present with similar symptoms to a hangover)

Uh no, pretty sure the question was based on the years and years of broscience that the only way to avoid a hangover the day after a night of hard drinking is to get right back to it when you wake up.

 

[Stagg737]

Uh no, pretty sure the question was based on the years and years of broscience that the only way to avoid a hangover the day after a night of hard drinking is to get right back to it when you wake up.

I think it probably has more to do with the vasoconstrictive/dilative effects of alcohol and the subsequent return to baseline after the initial effects wear off. When I was told about it, the person (a professor, actually) said that by drinking something with a low percentage of alcohol it can potentially slow the rate at which your vessels return to normal. I'd actually be interested in the physiology behind this idea, as it's actually worked for me a few times and has completely failed other times.

 

[Tuloste]

Happened at an autopsy we went to witness for a pathology class.

We watch as the pathologist removes the giblets and weights them one by one. As the colon gets inspected, its contents are dropped away into a waste bucket.

Conversation takes place at the end of the show.
pathologist: ...while we may take a sample from here and there, all of the organs go back in before the deceased is transferred back to its relatives.
girl: Do you also have to put the poop back in?
pathologist: No.. that goes into the incinerator.

 

[ACSurgeon]

She would be fine on a code team. If you've never done one, you should know that literally half the room has the card out and is staring at it, following the protocol. On the list of great things people have come up with, ACLS/ATLS are up there. They are explicitly designed so that anyone can run one, and run it correctly.

BTW - ATLS --> invented by an Orthopod. Suck it Gen Surg!

I thought you were going to talk about how most codes have same poor outcome so it wouldn't matter...

But you're correct, for patients who have a reversible cause and an actual chance at a good outcone, ACLS optimizes the odds.

 

[KnuxNole]

She would be fine on a code team. If you've never done one, you should know that literally half the room has the card out and is staring at it, following the protocol. On the list of great things people have come up with, ACLS/ATLS are up there. They are explicitly designed so that anyone can run one, and run it correctly.

BTW - ATLS --> invented by an Orthopod. Suck it Gen Surg!

The cards are helpful though! Without it, I think it would be a catastrophe, and the nurses, and physicians would be stuck. That's what I love about ACLS! Without it, all patients would be dying under my watch :O

 

[Goro]

Gawd, my 12 year old did that when he was 6!

Not really one question, but there's one person in my class who always asks about something the professor said literally 5 seconds earlier. Example

Prof: The Na-K pump is a form of active transport because it pumps sodium out of the cell and potassium into the cell against their respective gradients.

Student: So you're saying that it's active transport because it's moving the sodium and potassium against their gradients?

It's even worse because the questions are always a re-wording of what the professor just said. I wouldn't mind her just asking to repeat what the prof just said if the answer wasn't right on the slides that everyone has access to before the lecture starts and our lectures weren't recorded. Every time I see her hand go up I want to bang my head against a wall before she even asks anything.

 

[Kaustikos]

Do we have to come to class?

Clever girl.... lol

That wouldnt be any less ignorant than the NP who yelled for "STAT IV kayexalate" for hyperkalemia-induced V-tach. Forgot who told that story here a month ago or so.

We use the K-pen here. Like an Epi-pen, but with Kayexalate. We inject it into anyone that runs into the hospital screaming "I'm HYPERKALEMIC! HEEEEELP ME!"

But, tbt, I had my dumb moment involving Gilbert's. We get a question in path and the answer is hyperbilirubinemia blah blah and the professor explains saying "This is classic Gilbert in that french pronunciation. So, myself, never having heard it pronounced this way and not recognizing that it was Gilberts, raise my hand and ask "Okay, I understand this Gilbert Syndrome. How is that different from Gilbert?"
Professor thinks he's having a stroke. Class doesn't even know what the hell I'm asking. Actually, some thought I was being an dingus because he was pronouncing it that way. I was...being serious. He doesn't even respond. 15 seconds later - LIGHT BULB. I was embarrassed. I went to his office after and explained. Light bulb went off in his head and he chuckled. I've told this story so many times. Never gets old.

 

[CherryRedDracul]

I have so many I could add to this thread:

Me: Can a penis break? Like fracture?

Entire room

Prof: [Trauma Blonde], what is a fracture?

I defined fracture.

Prof: so if a penis has no bone, it can't be fractured.

Me: but it can have a "boner " (trying to salvage my dignity with humor)

The engineering side of me would go berserk if I heard that. A fracture is the separation of material into two or more pieces under the application of stress. Bones can be fractured, but the presence of bone does not define a fracture (at least in the general sense).

 

[TBV]

After just thoroughly explaining that our patient has generalized (Whole Brain) epilepsy, one student says that she has heard of people having lobectomies in order to stop the seizures and was wondering why the patient hasn't opted for surgery...

 

[TBV]

"Did your cancer put a financial strain on your family?"
Nope. Spending money is cheaper than not spending money... ya think?

 

[animando]

After seeing colonoscopy footage of a large intact carrot being found in the rectum, a guy at her school asked "how did they swallow that whole?"

Happened at an autopsy we went to witness for a pathology class.
We watch as the pathologist removes the giblets and weights them one by one. As the colon gets inspected, its contents are dropped away into a waste bucket.
Conversation takes place at the end of the show.
pathologist: ...while we may take a sample from here and there, all of the organs go back in before the deceased is transferred back to its relatives.
girl: Do you also have to put the poop back in?
pathologist: No.. that goes into the incinerator.

Both my favorites so far... involving rectum.

 

[TBV]

Well for some people it doesn't strain them at all. My friend's dad was a wealthy businessman who flew all over the country seeking help from the best doctors to try to treat his cancer but he ended up passing away. He spent over 100k from what my parents told me. Nevertheless, that is a very insensitive question to ask.

Well we knew this patient's career and it they struggled

 

[Mad Jack]

I have so many I could add to this thread:

Me: Can a penis break? Like fracture?

Entire room

Prof: [Trauma Blonde], what is a fracture?

I defined fracture.

Prof: so if a penis has no bone, it can't be fractured.

Me: but it can have a "boner " (trying to salvage my dignity with humor)

But you can break a penis, and it's a lot more common than you'd think. The break is actually known as a penile fracture, despite the penis lacking a bone, and your professor is actually wrong and made you look foolish for nothing. Knew this girl that did it to a guy on accident once, she thought her period had started early in the middle of sex. Guy started to realize things hurt, and sure enough, broken penis. She ended up with the unfortunate nickname of "Cockbreaker" for the rest of her life.

Edit: Should have read the rest of the thread before responding.